So today I'm in Farmville visiting my best friend ever Becca. Shes so freaking understanding and awesome!!!! Its a little awkward cause for a while i was basically in love with this girl but slowly but surely i got over it. She well, i really wish she could see herself from my shoes. Shes like the best, nicest, shes hot (and don't know it), shes down to earth, knows when to pick her fights. She really cares, and while she values her sleep above many others, she always leaves time for me and all of my late night woes.

So ya I'm tired but i am getting really frustrated because i am tired, i want to sleep but for the past few nights i cant sleep. I do nab a few hours, but waiting for it to come is torture. Like sleep is supposed to be like this natural human necessity and i know i rep being unique and different and weird, but I'm totally alone on this front. My body wants sleep, i need it, but for the life of me i cant get it. I just lay there for hours on end. I use to find sleep to be a quiet dreamy refuge from the harshities of the world, but its not anymore, its just sleep, its nothing, I wake up frazzled feeling worse than I did before. I feel worse than the nights that I get no sleep at all. Ive also noticed that well I'm kinda a little bit different. During the day I'm awake, I'm alive and functional. But its at night when I can really open up and be myself. Its an interesting phenomenon. I have not been so super concerned about it until this afternoon after wallmart, I was such a downer, i was really down, i just wanted to be left alone, to my thoughts. But after saying it out loud i realized that i wanted to be around Becca more so. I hadn't seen her for a legit long time, since the summer, and any time with Becca is a world better than no time at all, so i realized that i had to stay and make it work, even if i felt like stale shit. Specially since i don't know the next time i will get to see Becca in person. Talking over the phones good. Its OK, but face to face, I'm SO Happy right now, u don't even know, shes sleeping but i know that shes here and it makes my life better somehow. Maybe these are left over feelings from b4 but i think not, I'm over her, i was over her a long time ago and this this is what friendship feels like. I'm just reeling in the throngs of this super awesome friendship!!! : ) I could totally hug her right now, but shes sleeping and that could be kinda creeps.

Ne ways I'm super excited about this device called zipit. Its like this toy that I'm trying to put Linux on. And maybe i can even emulate xp? i dunno still working it out. I'm am on a hunt for the stupid mini sd adapter. I cant find it anywhere. Its really sad : ( omg and i need to get my tuition situation sorted out like 3 days ago. And get money into my acct to pay my credit card bill. I think i may have over drafted, like maybe 34 bucks, and then they would have hit me with a 39 dollar fee, so now i need to deposit 170 ish to come out even after my credit card bill. : ( good luck with that. Specially since my bank is only in nova so i gotta get my mom to do it since I'm not driving 90 miles home to pay da bills. And now that's kinda sad cause I hit the car and that's like 600 plus this 200 and I'm so freaking expensive. : (